The first time you do anything is always the hardest.

You don’t know what to expect. You don’t know what the experience will be. There are things you won’t anticipate.

Once you have experience, you can start anticipating and navigating a bit better. You’ll be more effective. It’s a better place to be when you’re handling something big. Or is it?

When someone you love is going through something horrible, it’s very difficult for friends and family to handle or navigate. Second-guessing is at an all time high. You’re always searching for the right thing, but rarely do you know if the right thing is what you’re doing. There’s guilt. Tension. Apprehension. And many thoughts and sentiments shared that perhaps shouldn’t have been.

I was going through this recently when a friend noted something fundamental to the situation: To have had experience in a terrible family tragedy requires a steep price paid.

Sometimes just getting the right perspective can change the way you see everything.