I was stuck in downtown Seattle, right smack in the middle of one of the largest homeless population centers in the country, and I couldn’t find a place to pee.

Because of the large homeless population, Seattle businesses have gotten very strict about allowing restroom access only for their customers. So if you have to go, you’re kind of out of luck unless you buy something from a local business.

As I was walking around trying to find a place, I realized I was looking at this all wrong. I’m in Seattle. Why am I looking for a restroom? There are homeless people all over the place urinating or defecating in the streets without anyone even noticing. Why am I worried?

So I started looking in the allies for something I could stand behind, so I couldn’t be seen. The longer I looked unsuccessfully, the more irritated I became. Heck, I worked at a place in Post Alley where it was not at all uncommon to walk out our front door to see someone peeing against the wall of our business. Why was I having such a hard time? I could literally go anywhere.

Having lowered my standards, I ended up behind a dumpster, in the back alley of a building. And wouldn’t you know, just as I was finishing, an officer walked up to me with his backup sitting in the car…

Naturally, I couldn’t help but ask him how they can justify trying to enforce this particular instance when the entire city, between the tent cities, the needles everywhere, using the sidewalks as a restroom, is basically lawless.

He said, I should know better…